Today is my birthday... Family and friends have left me "Best Wishes" and there are gifts waiting for me to open under the tree. The Love of My Life bought emergency birthday gifts because my real gifts haven't arrived from Hong Kong or Japan yet. My birthday's always been a bit funny. By the time it arrives two days after Christmas, people are tired of celebrating, shopping, and are thinking about diets and exercise and where they're going to spend New Year's Eve. And in reality... it's just a birthday. Everyone has one every single year. Some years are better than others, but they come on bad years as well as good ones, and you can't stop them or delay them.
Cake is a funny thing. I don't really like cake and don't care if we have one or not for my birthday. It's just cake, you know. So... what makes a birthday a birthday? It's not the food, the gifts, or even the company. Birthdays come even without those things- kind of like Whoville had Christmas after the Grinch stole it. A date on the calendar, it comes and it goes and it comes again. When you're a child, you think you'll never have another birthday after your last one and the time between each one feels like ten years or longer. But the clock rushes by as the birthdays come faster and faster until you find yourself thinking, "Didn't I have one of these recently? I could swear we just celebrated it!" And I know the alternative isn't a good thing, because there's only one way to stop having birthdays...
Exactly what am I saying? Darn if I know... but John Lennon says it best when he sings...
... And what have you done Another year over And a new one just begun
So this is Christmas And what have you done Another year over And a new one just begun Ans so this is Christmas I hope you have fun The near and the dear one The old and the young
A very merry Christmas And a happy New Year Let's hope it's a good one Without any fear And so this is Christmas For weak and for strong For rich and the poor ones The world is so wrong And so happy Christmas For black and for white For yellow and red ones Let's stop all the fight A very merry Christmas And a happy New Year Let's hope it's a good one Without any fear And so this is Christmas And what have we done Another year over And a new one just begun Ans so this is Christmas I hope you have fun The near and the dear one The old and the young A very merry Christmas And a happy New Year Let's hope it's a good one Without any fear War is over over If you want it War is over Now...
We made the decision to move here last year for two reasons. 1. to spend time with my parents while they were at their best and 2. to be closer to our kid when they decided to have a child.
This Christmas we realized both of those things were accomplished. I went Christmas shopping and out to lunch with my step mother. In all the years we've known each other, we've never had time to do that. I might even fit in some after Christmas shopping this year as well. Last Sunday we drove to my brother's church, sat with my parents, and watched him direct 20 -30 teenagers with loud instruments and then gave his 5 year old her birthday present. Christmas Eve, four generations gathered around my father's table and enjoyed the chaos that six under thirteen can cause when they've had too much sugar and too many gifts in a small space. The baby and her parents joined us here for Christmas Dinner and gifts last night. The real gifts we've been given this year is healing and redemption, love and grace.
The empty places at the table still hurt a little, but it's hard to notice them too much when the 9 month old is buried in wrapping paper, the two year old is grinding red jello into the carpet, the five year old is demanding attention, the seven year old is taking pictures with his sister's camera, the thirteen year old is attempting to control the chaos, and the newborn needs a new diaper... again! Accepting each other in spite of our faults, loving and appreciating each other because of our mistakes, finding peace and joy in the mess of life, I realized that we were richly blessed.
My parents are aging. They are slowing down and aching more. They travel less and even the hour and half drive to my house is too much right now. But my parents have changed in the last eight years. They have mellowed and grown and I find a sense of satisfaction in knowing that one doesn't have to be stuck in the past, but one can choose to move on at any age.
As my father held my grandchild, I realized that she will grow up with him in her life and that I couldn't give her a better gift. They will walk his garden, eat his fresh vegetables, pick his flowers, and track mud in the house. She will swing on his tire swing and climb his apple trees. And I will be there to watch them both. God willing, he has another good ten years to share with us, and we plan on being there for every single one of them, and for the bad years later. I will pick up my grandchild from her sitter sometimes and drive down to her Great Grandparents for a day in the country.
Christmas takes a lot of prep work and organization, and sometimes I think we spend too much time and effort on one day of the entire year, but the memories last a lifetime, or even four generations. It is the gift we give each other that can't be wrapped, or bought, or put under the tree. Merry Christmas, my friends. May your holidays be full of things that can't be put under the tree!
You think you have it bad this holiday season? At least you're not the Mall Santa in Jeff Markowitz' new book.
Behind in child support, two goomba's with necks the size of Mac Truck cabs and brains the size of peas threatening you for gambling losses, and with terrified children peeing on your lap, things don't look good for Tommy. The Santa gig at the Mall will take a little of the pressure off- or at least that's what Tommy hoped until the Mack family decided that Tommy needed to participate in a little five finger discounting for them if he wanted all ten of his fingers to keep working.
It's Mall Security to the rescue, spotting his fifteen minutes of fame, when Big Mack turns up dead in the bathroom and the tale takes off from there- a rollicking read!
Characters so realistic that you swear you saw them eating Cinnamon Bread at Mastori's across from you the last time you ate there. And the laughter? It will drown out Santa's Ho Ho Ho's. So put away all your seasonal tasks. Set aside the baking, the decorating, the wrapping of gifts. Quit shopping for Aunt Marla. You know she'll return anything you buy anyway. Don't worry about the dust bunnies under the table. Finding them there will give your mother-in-law greater joy than the expensive perfume you bought at Macy's. Buy your turkey already cooked with all the trimmings at the Acme down the street from Cassie's house. You have more important things to do this holiday season. You need to curl up with a good mystery and Jeff Markowitz has written the perfect one for this time of year.
It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Murder... everywhere you go! Order a copy today for Aunt Marla and your Mother-in-law, and while you're at it, order one for the mailman, the pizza delivery guy, your favorite bookie, and oh yeah, don't forget the Mall Santa and yourself while you're at it! Everything will look shinier and brighter when you're finished. So take time to curl up with a good book fresh off the presses of one of Xanga's real writers... doahsdeer! You'll be glad you took a reading break when you're finished!